I know I have not been writing a lot of blogs lately. I have been trying to keep busy with other things in life at the moment. But I just listened to the entire TTPD album for the 10th (!!!) time and I am DOWN BAD at the moment. Nearly one year in recovery (day 356 as of this writing) and my mind is still playing games with me. No, the urges are not there. But this is one of those times I am letting boredom take the reigns. Typically I would be on the side of not letting oneself get too bored because that could lead to relapse. But then again, sometimes being bored is alright. I can tell you, it’s a lot better than gambling.
In the journey of recovery from gambling addiction, embracing moments of boredom becomes a vital component of healing and growth. Boredom serves as a stark contrast to the rush of gambling, offering an invitation to reconnect with oneself and the world around us. In the quiet space of boredom, we are afforded the opportunity to cultivate mindfulness and self-awareness, to confront the underlying emotions and triggers that fuel addictive behaviors. It provides a sanctuary for reflection and introspection, allowing us to rediscover our passions, values, and sense of purpose beyond the confines of addiction. Embracing boredom in recovery should not be about succumbing to idleness, but rather about reclaiming agency over our time and attention, and nurturing a deeper appreciation for the richness of life's simple pleasures. It serves as a reminder that true fulfillment is found not in the fleeting highs of gambling, but in the depth and richness of our everyday experiences.
One thing we know ALL TOO WELL about this disease is that It makes us feel lonely as crap. When we gamble(d), we sometimes did it by ourselves because we feel ashamed and embarrassed we’re doing it in the first place. For some of us, that feeling of loneliness will not go away even in recovery. The journey to recovery can be a solitary one, as it requires introspection, honesty, and resilience in the face of inner turmoil. Additionally, the rebuilding of relationships strained by gambling may take time, leaving us feeling disconnected from loved ones and support networks. Moreover, the absence of the familiar comfort of gambling as a coping mechanism can amplify feelings of emptiness and uncertainty. While recovery offers the promise of a brighter future, it also entails navigating the complexities of loneliness as we learn to forge new connections and rebuild a sense of belonging.
If you’re currently feeling a similar way, please know you are not alone. There are many other people out there going through similar issues and want to help you. One of those places is right in the “Compulsive Gamblers in Recovery” discord server. Currently at 85 members and growing daily. I (u/geoffwinningdaily, naturalscholar (discord)) created this server as a supportive environment to help others with their gambling problems and hope to keep growing this moving forward.
https://discord.gg/qHwakUBa
I CAN DO IT WITH A BROKEN HEART is basically the anthem. Thank you Taylor.
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